The 10th Sub Level of Suicide

And so it would appear that my little blog has returned...



I just read somewhere out there that the ever elusive Leviathan are to return with a new album in what remains of 2011. I cannot wait and you have been warned.

Leviathan's music is among the most frightening and bleak in the crowded world of black metal. This is their first album from 2003, The Tenth Sub Level of Suicide. It is probably my favorite of Mr. Wrest's (Jeff Whitehead). Pain, damnation, despair and horror drench this album. It is the noose, it is the razor blade. It is the Demon's cry for your forsaken soul.It is the very pit of Hell.

...DOWNLOAD...

Dope Throne

Is that a bearded Satan taking a bong hit? Why I do believe it is...

This here is what is known as a seminal album. It is Electric Wizard's third release (anno 2000) and is soooo dope that they even put "dope" in the title.

Doom, stoner, psychedelic, horror... this little bit of rock n roll is a mammoth album. It absolutely crushes. Dopethrone showcases Electric Wizard at what may be considered their high point. This album in angry, sonic, mystical, and above all: mesmerizing.


So fire up the ol' bong, take your hair out of that pony tail, and get ready bang your head real slow like. And don't forget to turn the volume way the fuck up on your Mom's 1973 stereo receiver. Just not too loud, you don't want these dope vibrations to knock over her Hummel collection. That would be bad dude, real bad.



This is the re-release, so you get the bonus track Mind Transferral. Who doesn't love an extra song!?

...ENJOY...

Gotham Beggars Syndicate

Hailing from just West of Transylvania, from a country known as BRAZIL, Damn Laser Vampires are pretty God damned odd. Mixing elements of Rockabilly, Polka, New Wave, John Waters, Quentin Tarantino and pure camp horror, this is probably the album that could have saved that pathetic Halloween party you threw this year. Instead you chose to sit around with your loser friends, dressed up as a bunch of douches who went to Party City to buy costumes, and listening to the fuckin' Monster Mash while watching Scream 2. You should have been blasting Damn Laser Vampires while dancing like it's 1962 and you and your undead horde are about to turn your jerk off town into one giant undead/vampire party. Well, at least you know better for next year.

...enjoy...

Click HERE for Video.

Conqueror

BEHOLD! Gates of Slumber's third proper effort, Conqueror.

Does the supposed start to the Holiday season make you want to run full speed through the throngs of living dead at Wal Mart with blood stained Conan sword in hand? Yes, you say? Then this is the album for you. Pure doom. Pure metal. Gates of Slumber is in a metal category all their own. It is called: fucking awesome.

...enjoy...

Mosaic

There are few artists as evocative as David Eugene Edwards. Wovenhand would become his main musical concern as the (now) legendary 16 Horsepower came to its' end. This is Mosaic, the third album under the Wovenhand banner.

D.E.E.'s music is of a startling personal and spiritual nature. His Christian faith is evident throughout, but this ain't no Amy Grant album. It is often bleak in it's stark musical and lyrical landscapes. Mosaic can be soothing, but more often is violent, challenging, and urgent. At times this album can be overwhelming. Edward's has the unique ability to declare faith and spiritual crisis simultaneously- displaying a stunning honesty in his music. At times he seems like a Native American Shaman, possessed by visions and revelations. Within his now established tradition of dark Americana (established under the aforementioned 16 HP), Edwards infuses almost militaristic industrial elements- adding to the drama of it all.

Christian music is a genre I would recommend most people steer clear of- no matter your faith, or lack of faith. It is too often vapid nonsense, created by shallow souls seeking only to fill an economic vacuum and not a spiritual one. But Wovenhand is a bold and lively exception. Edward's is a poet possessed by a muse all his own. He does great service to his faith, showing it to be complicated and difficult while simultaneously being all encompassing and beautiful.

...enjoy...

Here's the link for a fan made video for the song "Dirty Blue"
using the short film The Hangman (1964).

Smiling Dogs

For you consideration: The debut album of once Colorado's, but now Brooklyn's, MAN'S GIN.

Moody, pensive and urgent, Smiling Dogs plays like a series of crime scene snapshots- each offering more questions than answers. Fronted by Cobalt's Erik Wunder, Man's Gin is one of the most innovative musical endeavors of 2010. The vocals of Wunder could easily draw comparisons to a young Chris Cornell while the tone of the album will inevitably draw comparisons to other Seattle luminaries from the 1990's (i.e. Alice in Chains). Think grunge, only darker and more menacing. And while such comparisons are inevitable, Man's Gin has more in common with the dark Americana of 16 Horsepower or the many expressions of a Mr. Dax Riggs (Acid Bath, Deadboy and the Elephantmen, etc.). Ultimately though, Smiling Dogs is an album with a distinct presence all its' own. It pulls the listener into a world of frustration, murder, confusion and despair... all with a pile of blood soaked money on the bed.

If you have already compiled your "Best of 2010" mixtape for you and your cat to listen to at your New Year's Eve party, I must request that you delete Like a G6 and make some room for Man's Gin.

...enjoy...

"Rise From Your Grave!"

After a long hibernation, this tiny and insignificant corner of the intraweb has new life in its' lungs.

Beginning Friday 11/19/10 new posts will begin to appear...rejoice!

Team America: World Police

Happy Birthday America, you beautiful son of a bitch. What are you, like 234 years old today? Well, God damn... you don't look a day over 157.

Team America may just be the most under appreciated film of the early 21st century. Do you hate terrorists? Well, so does Team America. Hate douchey celebs telling you how to vote? Check that one for Team America as well. How about marionette love making? I know you love it, and so does Team America, bitches. What may be even more amazing is this film's, and brilliant soundtrack of course, ability to explain U.S. foreign policy better than any Washington assclown. Is it pretty? No. But neither are marionette fuck scenes. Yet they are both necessary.

So happy birthday to America, easily the coolest country North of Mexico. And let's tip our hats to the founders of this nation, especially John Adams, Thomas Jefferson, George Washington and Jesus.

America. Fuck Yeah.

...enjoy...

I Have A Pony

Classic album.

You
are
welcome.

...enjoy...

The Jester Race

There was a time, long ago in a galaxy far far away, when I was a naive and simple youth. I sincerely believed that In Flames could and would never do wrong. I was right for a while... then ... they ... shit the bed. Oh well, at least we have their second full length, and first with lead vocalist Anders Friden, The Jester Race. This album was groundbreaking in 1996 as it took the still young Swede melodic death metal sound and really perfected it. It would also commence what would become a unifying theme on In Flames' following efforts: humankind is comprised of a bunch of assholes.

There are scores of hip American bands nowadays who are painfully attempting to rehash (aka rip off) the early In Flames as well as At The Gates sound... they are weak. Almost as weak as the latter day In Flames albums. Don't believe me? Then, download this example of supreme awesomeness, listen to it, and then head on over to Hot Topic and buy some of their new shite.

On a side note, check out "Lord Hypnos" as Anders displays his affinity for English Romantic poet William Wordsworth, by reading from "Ode: Intimations of Immortality." That's some classy shit right there.

...enjoy...

The Biz Never Sleeps

I remember a time, 1989 in fact, when all those of the gangsta persuasion were kept in check by one man. There was no rapper on rapper crime and all who rapped, were content to rap in this great man's rather imposing shadow. That man, was The Diabolical Biz Markie.

Those were good days, when the world was still civilized and appreciated the value of a human beat box. The good Biz's reign was short unfortunately. This due to a silly lawsuit and land mark(ie) ruling concerning sampling in music as well as the ever growing gangstafication trend in the scene. Short, but glorious The Biz's time was. But please don't fret, good blog reading person, The Biz lives on in our hearts and minds, as long as we continue on... he shall too. Lisping beat box and all. He's just not all that Diabolical these days... but was he really ever?

BONUS VIDEO!

...enjoy...

Traveller

Released in 2003, Traveller is an epic piece of music based on the 1970's role playing game of the same name. Now, I know what you are thinking... how could an album be any good if it is based on a role playing game? Well, that's just how sick a band Slough Feg (they shortened their name a few years ago) have been over the years. They could sing songs about the daily trials and tribulations of your kitchen toaster oven and it would blow your simple mind half way across your shitty little neighborhood. Traveller takes you on a Sci Fi adventure among the stars where epic battles lay waste to alien species across the universe. At least that's what I think is going on. Led by the legendary Mike Scalzi (ex Hammers of Misfortune), this album is an ode to guitar driven heavy metal. The riffs alone have been rumored to induce premature labor. Scalzi's vocals are as impressive as they are unique to the metal world.

There are soooo many bands that rehash "old school" heavy metal and it just comes across so cheesy and stale. Slough Feg are not and have never been one of these impostors. These guys are of a wholly different variety, existing not just beyond, but on a different plane of existence than the silly trends of the metal world. No trend fuckery here kids. Slough Feg are a unique musical experience that have remained underground for far too long. Their originality is a breath of fresh air and as we have seen all too often, artistic originality and talent don't necessarily result in financial success. So, after you download this album and realize how empty your life has been without it, I ask that you proceed to purchase everything ever produced by Slough Feg HERE.

Until then... The Lord Weird Slough Feg serve as a painful reminder as to just how weak your metal is.

...enjoy...

High Expectations/Low Results

Canada's Faunts released their debut album, High Expectations/Low Results, in the year of our Lord 2005. It's a fuzz filled pop experience, summoning inspiration from the likes of My Bloody Valentine and Sigur Ros. The album unfolds with a gentle melancholy and ever present pop consciousness, albeit spacey and lazy (in this case, lazy is meant as a compliment). The songs come across like a picture that remains just a bit out of focus, creating an ethereal haze of sound and emotion. The album is extremely accessible, which is rather important in the world of pop, but definitely travels at its' own pace. The songs are in no rush, and when you give this album a spin I suggest you not be in one either.

...enjoy...

Universal Migrator Part 1: The Dream Sequencer

Ayreon is the epic-prog rock project of the Dutchman Arjen Lucassen. This album, Universal Migrator Part 1: The Dream Sequencer, is part of a larger series of similarly themed albums, but is more directly related to its' counterpart Universal Migrator Part 2: Flight of the Migrator, which was released congruently back in 2000. Quite the mouthful, huh? Anyway, Arjen is the ever intrepid prog musician. He collected a series of talents to join him on his quest, including but not limited to Lana Lane, Neal Morse and Johan Edlund. One of those things does not belong... That's right, Johan Edlund from Tiamat contributes his distinct baritone for what is perhaps the highlight of the album "My House on Mars."

I should probably take a moment and explain what this album is all about...

It's 2084, and the earth has consumed itself in war. Everyone is dead. Colonists on Mars are now dying as a result (no imports of food, water, soap, etc.) There is this awesome machine, called the Dream Sequencer. It allows you to travel through time and live the experiences of famous people and events. Like a virtual reality history lesson. This one poor chap is the last person alive on Mars, or anywhere for that matter, and he hops in the machine to live out his days as best he can. Let the fun and adventure begin! Enter Sir Francis Drake, Rembrandt, Neil Armstrong, Druids, Mayans, etc etc etc...

I'm not too into the "rock opera" scene. But, this album somehow keeps making it back into my rotation after all these years. Especially Edlunds track.

Part 2 has some lad named Bruce Dickinson. But I never made it that far.

...enjoy...

Rainaway Town

Sweden's Kristofer Astrom (Fireside) released this uber friendly folk/pop album anno 2007, proving that sometimes simple and straightforward songwriting is the way to go. Catchy yet introspective acoustic guitar rock rules the day here. The album flows with a familiarity that makes it a fine companion to long summer drives and camp side fires. Fellow Swede Mattias Hellberg (of this band and that band, etc.) lends his talents to "Just a Little Insane." "Conjure Me," despite the multiple high points this album provides, is easily the winning track off Rainaway Town. Don't believe me? Then download it and let me know why I'm wrong. asshole.

...enjoy...