I Have A Pony

Classic album.

You
are
welcome.

...enjoy...

The Jester Race

There was a time, long ago in a galaxy far far away, when I was a naive and simple youth. I sincerely believed that In Flames could and would never do wrong. I was right for a while... then ... they ... shit the bed. Oh well, at least we have their second full length, and first with lead vocalist Anders Friden, The Jester Race. This album was groundbreaking in 1996 as it took the still young Swede melodic death metal sound and really perfected it. It would also commence what would become a unifying theme on In Flames' following efforts: humankind is comprised of a bunch of assholes.

There are scores of hip American bands nowadays who are painfully attempting to rehash (aka rip off) the early In Flames as well as At The Gates sound... they are weak. Almost as weak as the latter day In Flames albums. Don't believe me? Then, download this example of supreme awesomeness, listen to it, and then head on over to Hot Topic and buy some of their new shite.

On a side note, check out "Lord Hypnos" as Anders displays his affinity for English Romantic poet William Wordsworth, by reading from "Ode: Intimations of Immortality." That's some classy shit right there.

...enjoy...

The Biz Never Sleeps

I remember a time, 1989 in fact, when all those of the gangsta persuasion were kept in check by one man. There was no rapper on rapper crime and all who rapped, were content to rap in this great man's rather imposing shadow. That man, was The Diabolical Biz Markie.

Those were good days, when the world was still civilized and appreciated the value of a human beat box. The good Biz's reign was short unfortunately. This due to a silly lawsuit and land mark(ie) ruling concerning sampling in music as well as the ever growing gangstafication trend in the scene. Short, but glorious The Biz's time was. But please don't fret, good blog reading person, The Biz lives on in our hearts and minds, as long as we continue on... he shall too. Lisping beat box and all. He's just not all that Diabolical these days... but was he really ever?

BONUS VIDEO!

...enjoy...

Traveller

Released in 2003, Traveller is an epic piece of music based on the 1970's role playing game of the same name. Now, I know what you are thinking... how could an album be any good if it is based on a role playing game? Well, that's just how sick a band Slough Feg (they shortened their name a few years ago) have been over the years. They could sing songs about the daily trials and tribulations of your kitchen toaster oven and it would blow your simple mind half way across your shitty little neighborhood. Traveller takes you on a Sci Fi adventure among the stars where epic battles lay waste to alien species across the universe. At least that's what I think is going on. Led by the legendary Mike Scalzi (ex Hammers of Misfortune), this album is an ode to guitar driven heavy metal. The riffs alone have been rumored to induce premature labor. Scalzi's vocals are as impressive as they are unique to the metal world.

There are soooo many bands that rehash "old school" heavy metal and it just comes across so cheesy and stale. Slough Feg are not and have never been one of these impostors. These guys are of a wholly different variety, existing not just beyond, but on a different plane of existence than the silly trends of the metal world. No trend fuckery here kids. Slough Feg are a unique musical experience that have remained underground for far too long. Their originality is a breath of fresh air and as we have seen all too often, artistic originality and talent don't necessarily result in financial success. So, after you download this album and realize how empty your life has been without it, I ask that you proceed to purchase everything ever produced by Slough Feg HERE.

Until then... The Lord Weird Slough Feg serve as a painful reminder as to just how weak your metal is.

...enjoy...

High Expectations/Low Results

Canada's Faunts released their debut album, High Expectations/Low Results, in the year of our Lord 2005. It's a fuzz filled pop experience, summoning inspiration from the likes of My Bloody Valentine and Sigur Ros. The album unfolds with a gentle melancholy and ever present pop consciousness, albeit spacey and lazy (in this case, lazy is meant as a compliment). The songs come across like a picture that remains just a bit out of focus, creating an ethereal haze of sound and emotion. The album is extremely accessible, which is rather important in the world of pop, but definitely travels at its' own pace. The songs are in no rush, and when you give this album a spin I suggest you not be in one either.

...enjoy...

Universal Migrator Part 1: The Dream Sequencer

Ayreon is the epic-prog rock project of the Dutchman Arjen Lucassen. This album, Universal Migrator Part 1: The Dream Sequencer, is part of a larger series of similarly themed albums, but is more directly related to its' counterpart Universal Migrator Part 2: Flight of the Migrator, which was released congruently back in 2000. Quite the mouthful, huh? Anyway, Arjen is the ever intrepid prog musician. He collected a series of talents to join him on his quest, including but not limited to Lana Lane, Neal Morse and Johan Edlund. One of those things does not belong... That's right, Johan Edlund from Tiamat contributes his distinct baritone for what is perhaps the highlight of the album "My House on Mars."

I should probably take a moment and explain what this album is all about...

It's 2084, and the earth has consumed itself in war. Everyone is dead. Colonists on Mars are now dying as a result (no imports of food, water, soap, etc.) There is this awesome machine, called the Dream Sequencer. It allows you to travel through time and live the experiences of famous people and events. Like a virtual reality history lesson. This one poor chap is the last person alive on Mars, or anywhere for that matter, and he hops in the machine to live out his days as best he can. Let the fun and adventure begin! Enter Sir Francis Drake, Rembrandt, Neil Armstrong, Druids, Mayans, etc etc etc...

I'm not too into the "rock opera" scene. But, this album somehow keeps making it back into my rotation after all these years. Especially Edlunds track.

Part 2 has some lad named Bruce Dickinson. But I never made it that far.

...enjoy...

Rainaway Town

Sweden's Kristofer Astrom (Fireside) released this uber friendly folk/pop album anno 2007, proving that sometimes simple and straightforward songwriting is the way to go. Catchy yet introspective acoustic guitar rock rules the day here. The album flows with a familiarity that makes it a fine companion to long summer drives and camp side fires. Fellow Swede Mattias Hellberg (of this band and that band, etc.) lends his talents to "Just a Little Insane." "Conjure Me," despite the multiple high points this album provides, is easily the winning track off Rainaway Town. Don't believe me? Then download it and let me know why I'm wrong. asshole.

...enjoy...

Gods of the Earth

We have here, the latter of two releases by Texas doomsters, The Sword. Gods of the Earth was released way back in 2008 and has seen the band reach all sorts of new highs (pun intended). They've seen their music seep into the collective (un)consciousness of video gamers with songs featured in some supposed game called Guitar Hero. You may have heard of it. They have also toured extensively with a band who call themselves Metallica. But let us not hold any of this against them.

Some out there, and they are legion, condemn The Sword as "hipster" metal. Now, I'm not saying there aren't "hipster" trend fuck bands out there latching on to the whole retro metal movement. I'm just saying that The Sword are too good to be lumped with them. If classic Black Sabbath and early Metallica are two sounds you would like see blended together, than these guys are for you.

Gods of the Earth is a more tightly composed album than it's predecessor, although Age of Winters is pretty awesome too, but what is special about The Sword is their ability to take classic metal ingredients, mix them together, and have the result be familiar yet refreshing. Having a couple songs based on Conan stories ("The Frost Giant's Daughter" & "The Black River") never hurts either.

Let the head banging commence.

...enjoy...

Oh Nooooo

The intraweb seems to be having problems today. More specifically, Mediafire can't get its' shit together... Past uploads seem to be affected as well :(

As soon as this problem rectifies itself, we will be up and running again...

Always Say Please and Thank You

Easily the most popular posting on this here blog has been Jay Munly's, Munly & The Lee Lewis Harlots. So for today I offer you his parent band, Slim Cessna's Auto Club...

Slim Cessna and his Auto Club are Colorado alt-country/Americana royalty. Their live performances are the stuff of legend (which I as of yet have been unable to experience). Slim's story telling takes the listener through a variety of American musical landscapes as he invokes elements of big-tent revivalism, singing (and sometimes yodeling) songs about God and the ever tempting Satan. His tongue is firmly in cheek, it would appear, but it doesn't seem to detract from the charm and even conviction of this utterly enjoyable, quirky and rambunctious album. Their is a dark mood deep beneath the album, although not as dark as Mr. Munly's or even The good Rev. Glasseye solo works, but it does lend a nice and sinister edge at times. Slim's knack for compelling story telling as well as diverse musical compositions, make this album a must have.

PS: It was released on Jello Biafra's Alternative Tentacles, which is easily one of the best independent labels around. And they've been around for a long time.

...enjoy...